Changes
by xXxThe Phantom's RosexXx
Summary: A death can change a lot of things, sometimes for the worse and sometimes for the better.


A/N: I don't own 21 Jump Street but if anyone wants to give me Tom Hanson and Doug Penhall, I wouldn't decline

**A/N: I don't own 21 Jump Street but if anyone wants to give me Tom Hanson and Doug Penhall, I wouldn't decline. **

**Changes – A 21 Jump Street One-Shot **

The drizzling rain was a comfort, a shared sadness between nature and myself. The raindrops were like tears that the world was shedding. I look around and see his mother, crying as I had figured she'd be doing. She shouldn't be crying. Didn't love him in life why'd she love him in death? That's what bugged me about some mothers, they took their kids for granted. That reminds me, I probably should call my mom after I get home. Haven't called her since Christmas. I should probably do that.

I look over and see Judy. Oh Judy! She is crying, wiping away tears like a madman – or woman in her case. Her nose is drippy and red but despite all of that, I want to take her in my arms and hold her close. I want to have her cry on my shoulder like she did all those years ago. Things change I guess. Now she probably doesn't even want to see me or speak to me. I did kind of up left. Haven't talked to her since. I hope she'll pull through. She's tough – tougher than me at times.

Next there's Fuller. He isn't crying but I swear to God his eyes are red. He was close to him, you know. He was close to all of us. If any one of us were to die…it'd kill Fuller. I almost feel sorry for the guy. He used to tell us not to get ourselves killed – too much paperwork on his part. This is gonna be a hell of a lot of paperwork for him.

After Fuller, there's Harry. Harry has his head down so I can't read his emotions but I'd suspect he's just as sad as the next guy. He looks good. Seems to have pulled through since his coma several years back. How long ago was that exactly? Five years? Five years ago. Wow. Have I really been gone that long?

How could I leave them? I mean, sure the whole cop thing wasn't my deal but still, these people were my family. How could I just leave them?

"Would any one like to share a few words?" the guy in the collar asks.

"I would," says a voice, and it takes me a few moments to realize it was mine.

"Alright son, please share."

"Alright," I clear my throat and begin, "I worked on the Jump Street program with Penhall. He and I were partners. We'd go undercover as brothers…but our cover wasn't over when a case closed. We _were _brothers. I'd have given my life for that crazy son of a…" I glance down and think that maybe that wouldn't be an appropriate word choice, "Anyways," I clear my throat again, "Penhall was my brother. He kept me going strong – going straight. There were lots of times that I just wanted to leave, and finally one day – despite his begging – I left. I didn't want to leave the force and the people I loved but I felt at the time that I had too. This is the first time in five years that I've seen them again. I wish it was under different circumstances. I wish I could have…I wish I could have been there for them. You know, I didn't even keep in contact with Doug when I left. Funny, I figured he'd be the one who'd be the best man at my wedding, my kids' godfather – we had plans to become geezers together and raise hell in a nursing home. Now…we'll never have that chance. I just…I just wish I could have told him goodbye. I wish I could have held his hand in the hospital and tell him I loved him. I…" great, here comes the water works. My head drops and I step back from the podium. The priest pats my back.

I turn and go back to where I had been standing prior to being called out. The team stands on the other side from me but I can feel their heavy stares. I look up and see Judy. She lifts a hand and gives it a wave. I wave back. If it had been five years ago, I'd have gone over to her and hugged her. Lord knows she needed a hug right now. Why wasn't anyone giving her one? Oh, right. That was my job on the force. Judy's having a hard time, I go over, give her a hug and make it better. Too bad a kissed boo-boo won't make anything better now.

Before I know it, the funeral is over and everyone has dispersed. I see Judy walk over to the casket and lay a hand on the heavy wooden lid. A tear drops from her cheek and stains the mahogany.

"Hey," I begin. It took me awhile to find my voice.

"Hey," she looks over at me. No one says anything and finally, she breaks the ice, "I was there you know."

"Huh?"

"I was there when…when he got shot."

"Judy…"

"We…we were on a case. I can't go into the details with _you _obviously but we were chasing this guy and he turned and shot. Fired two shots, one for me, one for Doug. My shot missed. Doug was closer and wasn't as lucky. The EMS came and took him to Sacred Heart but it was no good. He died with me by his side – a bullet in his heart."

"Judy…I…"

"He missed you like crazy," her voice turned into ice, "We all did, Hanson. Hell, he wouldn't stop sayin' how if he could have made you stay and wishin' he could have done if differently."

"He couldn't have done anything. I…I wanted to."

"I know," she nodded, "That's what I told him. I told him it was your own stupid decision and he couldn't beat himself up over your mistakes."

"Mistake?"

"It was a mistake, right?" She asked, "Leaving."

"I…I guess," I nodded, "Yeah."

"What do you do now, Hanson?"

"I…I'm a lawyer. Defense lawyer."

"I can see that," she smiled, "I'm glad you're happy."

"Hey, I didn't say that," I shake my head, "I never said I was happy."

"You aren't?"

"Nope," I smile, "Not one bit."

"What are you going to do?"

"I made my bed," I sigh, "Now I've got to sleep in it."

"I'll talk to Fuller…"

"Judy, don't. I'll be okay…"

"It's just that…we miss you."

"I miss you too," I nod. I can't take it any more and swing my arm over her shoulder and pull her into my chest.

"Thanks, Hanson," she smiled.

"What for?"

"For knowing that I just need a hug."

"Hey, that's what I'm here for," I give her a kiss on the side of the head before releasing her.

"Hanson…I'll talk to Fuller."

"Judy…"

"I will. You can come back to the force and things will be normal again."

"They can never be normal again. They can never go back to being normal."

"Hanson…"

"Have you ever lost a brother?"

"No," she shakes her head.

"Well I did. It hurts like hell."

"I know," she nods, "See, I didn't lose a brother. I lost a…a husband."

"A husband?" I raise an eyebrow.

"Yeah," she looks down.

"Guess a lot can change in five years."

"Yeah," she nods, "It can."

"But one thing that's never going to change is that I'm here for you, got me?" I ask, raising an eyebrow.

"I know. And I'm always here for you."

"Come on," I jerk my head towards my Mustang, "Why don't I treat my sister to dinner."

"Sister?"

"You married my brother. That makes you my sister."

"I like the sound of that," she nods, "Thanks Hanson."

"Bye, buddy," I wave to his casket, "I salute you!" And before I can stop my self, I do the McQuaid salute.

For the last time.

**A/N: Reviews anyone? I know it's a crappy story but I'm trying to improve so reviews would really brighten up my day. **


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